SUSPICION

i could see why you feel it.
it is a little weird how me and him are on perfectly good terms.
but it was the situation.
i guess that i felt that it was my job to hate the ex-boy friend, that by default i had disliked him.
but when all you hear is bad things about that person, when all your surrounded with is legit reasons on why not to like someone, you're going to find your self not liking that person.
dont get me wrong, i still dont like the fact that he did do things that hurt you.
but we talked.
it was brief, but i guess we both got to understand each others side. i have always looked at him as a friend and i really like him as a person. and now that i really have no reason to NOT like him, im not going to watse my time with having enemies. i cant stand that feeling of resentment, so im not going to deal with.
i've decided to just push past whatever flaws of a person, of myself, of the situation, to the side and just focus on having a good year.
like i said before, i dont want any regrets. i just want everyone to be happy. and im happy.
believe me, i still wish i was the person that could hug you and hold your hand whenever i damn well pleased, and i guess i still could, but not in the same way.
i dont know why its this hard for me. it was TWO weeks. thats it.
you would think it would be easy for someone to get over someone they were with for only TWO weeks, but its not.
i guess its because i never had that with someone before. i've never spent a night on the beach with somone or stared at the stars, or any of those memorable things we did.
i know you probably have.alot. but i havent.
godddd there is so much more i want to get out, but this as already gotten really long.
so there.
any questions?