Just so you're not freaking out, I will be updating my other blog and not this one. Just letting you so don't expect anyhing on here

today

current mood: tired, slightly uptight.
highlight of the day: having mary from the canvani string quartet say "hit your mom!"
worst part: sister.car.yelling at her.
looking forward to: getting SOLs over with, summer
current "want": savannah
current "need": sleep
focus of the week: get everything for juries down SOLID
question of the day: what are you put here for?
quote of the day: "sometimes you cant see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of other." -ellen

100th post

so today was cool. iguess. chemistry i understand whats going on at the moment but im still scared about the test coming up, like always. taking a test on two chapters issssss greaaattt. triggy trig was cool too. learned stuff. then in english we just looked at this power point about the lord of the flies. which we started today. im excited to read it and i was the clicker hahahah. when i was sitting in english, victoria and alexis sat by me and they were talking about a whole bunch of stuff that i had no idea about. and alexis openly said everyone she is inviting to her party. of course i wasnt one of them. not that i blame her. but she was talking about it right next to me and it hurt. i shouldnt care seeing that i didnt invite her to mine, but its really kicking in how we're barely hanging on to even call eachother "friends". so i mean, its ok. im fine with it. what can i do ya know? what can they do? nothing really so we're just going to have to move on. i think thats one of the reasons why im so excited to get this year over with. so that these "friendships" that are slowly deiing, can just die. thats really harsh and sounds alot worse than i mean it, but it would be for the best. we all need to move on. what really sucks is that i promised them i wouldnt be that gsa kid that just drops all their old friends. but that shouldnt be a label. it isnt a label. its just the convieniance and inconvieniance of things and its that fact that being in gsa is so fucking time consuming and its so easy to make friends with people there. its not being that gsa kid, but being a student at gsa that creates this new life. why am i stillllll letting this get to me. i love them. thats why. so much has changed about me, about them, about our lives (well mine) but the past hasnt. and the same time i say that, im saying i want our relationship to just die. well, to sum it all up, im sad, they arent, ill get over it.